coming home: why restoring homecoming matters

This past weekend, I returned to Kingston for Homecoming Weekend at Queen’s University—twenty years after graduating with my undergraduate degree. It was an unbelievable time.

Everywhere I went, I ran into faces I hadn't seen in years. People were genuinely excited to be there, and it was wonderful to catch up with friends I knew in different capacities in what truly feels like a lifetime ago now. There were definitely some standout absences, but I've made sure those people have received ample warning that we've committed to a return in 2030 for our 25th reunion.

In many ways, it felt like being transported back in time. Stepping into familiar spaces was so comforting. Places I spent a lot of time in took me right back—Grant Hall, the JDUC, the AMS Offices, Clark Hall Pub, University Ave, The Brass, Bubba's, the QP, Richardson Stadium, Stages Night Club. Some of these places have definitely changed (not necessarily for the better either), but they all still reminded me of some of the best days of my life.

Queen's has always held such an important piece of my heart. The years I spent there were truly transformative. I met some of my very closest friends—people who shaped me and many of whom are still a huge part of my life today. It was so nice to not only be reminded of those days, but to celebrate them with people who were there and hold that common understanding. There was just so much to be joyful about.

The other part that I loved about being back was reconnecting with that time when I was with Emma. Being able to reminisce with people who knew her and loved her like I did brought me so much happiness. I loved hearing new stories and remembering old ones. She truly was a legend. Of course, no visit to campus is complete without a visit to her bench, except this time it was with friends who shared her light and laughter with me.

It's hard to imagine that twenty years have flown by since I left Queen's. In that time, so much has changed about the University—and one change in particular stood out this weekend.

A Tradition Transformed

One of the things most of my '05 class was discussing over the weekend though, was the Administration's recent decision to change the timing of Homecoming. It now happens during students' reading week to avoid having alumni and students on campus at the same time.

I have to say, this decision is deeply disappointing to me as an alum.

Homecoming is a time-honoured Queen's tradition. As a student, I remember loving Homecoming not only because it was a celebration, but because it was fun to meet alumni. I genuinely enjoyed conversations at the QP or at the football game, asking them about the traditions that had continued, what had changed since they were here, and what they were doing now. Homecoming was an opportunity for students to make connections and to learn.

It also helped me see that being a Queen's student made me part of something bigger. There have been so many times in my life and career when my Queen's connection has opened a door for me. Homecoming helped me start seeing myself as a part of that broader community.

There were next to no students to meet on campus this year. There were a few working at the AMS offices and at the QP, but other than that, they just weren't here. Because of the decision to plan Homecoming during their Reading Week, students didn't get to see how important 'coming home' to Queen's is to us alumni. They didn't get to hear our stories or find out what we're doing now because the University decided to end that tradition.

Understanding the Challenge

I understand why the decision was made. For years, the University and the City of Kingston have been at odds on what to do to address the Homecoming street parties, particularly on Aberdeen Street. This isn't new—it's been a source of contention for decades. In my time at Queen's, I remember the tension really mounting. The University's Administration was getting an extreme amount of pressure from the City as the Homecoming party each year continue to grow.

In my fourth year, I served as Vice-President of Operations of the Alma Mater Society of Queen's University, so I got a front-row ticket to these discussions. The City wanted to see the parties shut down and was planning an aggressive law-enforcement approach to the problem. Despite trying to propose various alternatives to try to curb the major issues, and work collaboratively with the City, it was clear that there was not much of an appetite. Ultimately, the University proposed an alternative: licence our student centre and have us, the student government, run an event as an alternative to the parties on Aberdeen.

It was an epic failure. No one came and the party on Aberdeen raged on (obviously). The City had brought in reinforcement police officers from surrounding areas, including officers on horseback, ticketing and arresting students.

The following year, the same approach continued, and Queen's made front-page news in the Globe and Mail when a car was flipped on Aberdeen Street—though no mention was made that the individual involved was neither an alumnus nor a Queen's student. These parties have continued since, to varying degrees. It really makes me question whether the law-enforcement-heavy angle has been the most appropriate (not to mention cost-effective) approach to the problem. Yet it's clear the City continues to double down.

Walking down Aberdeen Street this weekend, there have been physical changes to the street. It has been redesigned with narrower front properties, wider sidewalks, and city easements complete with concrete garden boxes. I imagine it makes it easier for someone to be ticketed should they step onto city property when drinking on a front lawn.

There was also a constant police presence all day Saturday. In the morning, I was at a backyard pancake kegger—a typical pre-football game activity on Homecoming weekend. However, in our 40s, this looked very different. It was a very civilized affair with a catered breakfast thanks to a food truck and canned drinks with plenty of recycling. Music was playing at a reasonable volume and the crowd was around 40 people.

Despite this, four police came in to respond to a "call they had received." Totally bogus. The police had also conveniently flown a drone over the party shortly before their visit. That alone should have been sufficient to tell them we were no cause for concern.

Later that afternoon, driving past the "command post," we saw countless police from numerous detachments and a van with at least eight officers in riot gear. Thankfully, they weren't sent to the next backyard party I attended. We were only graced by a walk-through of two officers who seemed to be walking through the backyards of all surrounding properties. It felt really unnecessary, though it was understood they were doing their job, so of course they weren't given any trouble.

What's at Stake

I understand why the University has considered a new Homecoming date as an option. However, I also understand that next weekend is Faux-Co (Fake Homecoming) for students which basically just replaces real Homecoming but without Alumni and all the tradition. So have we really solved anything? Or have we simply severed the ties that Queen's has always been known for, while the party continues anyway?

And here's what concerns me: Homecoming generates significant revenue for both Queen's and the City of Kingston. Hotels fill up, restaurants are packed, and local businesses thrive. Beyond the economics, though, universities need their alumni, especially now. We donate, we mentor, we hire graduates, and we sustain the community that shaped us. Alienating generations of alumni by eliminating this cherished tradition seems like an odd move for an institution that depends on those relationships.

I'm not a particularly wealthy donor, but I've been someone who has donated what I would consider a fair amount to the University over the years. In fact, leading up to Homecoming, I had been considering organizing another larger gift in honour of Emma—something meaningful to celebrate her legacy. A wise friend mentioned I should consider going to Homecoming first, seeing firsthand how the University is doing. I am certainly glad that I did.

I know I'm not alone in feeling this way. I had this conversation with countless alumni over the course of the weekend. I know many will be providing feedback to Queen's too.

A Hope for the Future

I'm writing this because I love Queen's. The joy I felt this weekend reconnecting with friends, remembering Emma, and reliving those transformative years reminded me why this place matters so much. And it's precisely why this decision troubles me.

I genuinely hope the University will reconsider this approach. There has to be a way to address legitimate concerns about public safety while preserving the intergenerational connection that makes Homecoming special. I encourage the University to work with its Alumni and its students—they have ideas and investment in finding solutions. Explore creative alternatives that don't require abandoning what makes this tradition meaningful.

Twenty years have passed since I graduated, and I'm already looking forward to 2030 for our 25th reunion. I hope by then Queen's will have found a way to welcome both alumni and students back together because that's when Homecoming truly feels like coming home.